In a recent phone interview, I pretended to be interested in golf and fishing just to be able to act like I cared about recreational opportunities. Next time I think I’ll ask about jogging trails and bungee-jumping. And wind-boarding. Or base-boarding. Or free-basing.

I’m pretty sure none of those are real outdoor activities, but somehow I think people believing I have a serious coke habit would make me a more interesting job candidate than the truth, which is that I’m just plain boring. The most exciting things I’ve done in the past month outside of work, in rough descending order of excitement:

• I spent about 14 hours in my car to visit Memphis and see Ole Miss lose to Florida one weekend.
• I visited a friend who’s just starting out in a job in Baton Rouge.
• I watched a lot of TV.
• I sent out a paper for review.
• I got my laptop back from CompUSA in Metarie.
• I did laundry a few times.

Why I can’t just be a normal person and admit my non-work interests mostly revolve around watching Pardon The Interruption and The Office and being generally socially awkward are beyond me.